Dishabituation: Embracing Change for Personal Growth
How do you get over habits, whether good or bad?
It’s not Monday, but here’s a lesson I’ve been learning from a book I’m reading.
I am inspired and envious of people like my wife. She has an innate confidence to examine a predicament or situation, evaluate her emotions and options, and assess the path she needs to take if a new path is warranted. If it is, she takes that path.
Conversely, I am cautious about honestly evaluating a troublesome situation. I consider my emotions and options too long. Subsequently, I succumb to paralysis by analysis and ignore indications that the time for me to make a change has arrived.
In Look Again: The Power of Noticing What Was Always There by coauthors Tali Sharot and Cass R. Sunstein, they classify my behavior as habituation, “which means that we respond less and less to stimuli that repeat.” I’m not alone in this. We’re all prone to habituate. I notice this every summer when some of our high school alums' former athletes return to campus to get workouts or just come to say hello. Some of these athletes dreaded the workouts and didn’t go to college to compete. Yet they come to work out independently or be around the environment again. It’s most noticeable the first two summers after they graduate high school. They almost don’t know what to do with their extra time now that a coach isn’t making them practice.
We always love for our alums to come back and visit. However, “When we habituate to the bad things,” or at least things that keep us from growing in other ways, as Sharot and Sunstein write, “we are less motivated to strive for change.” So, in Sharot and Sunstein’s research, they find that dishabituation is a critical aspect of growth. Essentially, dishabituation is a defamiliarization process with circumstances and behaviors we are comfortable with. Dishabituation can help us become more appreciative of the goodness of what’s in front of us already. Even better, dishabituation can help us learn how to take necessary risks that can expand the possibilities of goodness in our world.
I recognize the need for dishabituation from my comforts can be transformative. I still struggle with breaking free from familiar patterns and making bold decisions, but I see the value of stepping out of my comfort zone as crucial for growth as I age.
If you’re like me, challenging yourself to notice and appreciate what we have and taking risks can cultivate growth and help us embrace new opportunities. My wife’s example and the insights from Sharot and Sunstein remind me that change is possible and essential for a more fulfilling and dynamic life.
Are you the type of person who can easily dishabituate or do you find dishabituation more difficult, like me? How do you get over your fears of leaving habits behind? I’d love to read your comments below.